Gastro and The Perfect Housewife

The kitchen and I have had a disagreement! We're not on speaking terms at the moment....


Well, technically it's not the kitchens fault, it's a conspiracy between the weather and my A/C but I feel the kitchen is being belligerent so hence the tension!

Anyhow, now that I can confidently eat all the yummy bakiness without pre arranging a trip to the emergency room the heat is probably a blessing. I might not be able to restrain myself and I’ll eat myself into a cake induced coma….

Come to think of it though, I don’t think I could cook even if I wanted to at the moment.

You see, I no longer know where to find anything in my own kitchen.

It’s been violated.

My mother came to stay….

Last week Blue, Rusty and I came down with the worst case of gastro we’ve ever had. You know the kind I mean, where you’re laying on the floor of the bathroom hoping to pass out…

So my parents kindly dropped what they were doing and drove the 2.5hrs to come and nurse us all…

Which was fantastic, don’t know what we would have done without them. But, it also meant that my mother had three uninterrupted, unsupervised days in which to completely rearrange my house, to suit herself!

You see my mother is the perfect 1950’s housewife. She still irons creases in jeans, irons sheets and underwear and tea towels.

She cleans her toilet daily and I don’t mean she swishes some bleach around she scrubs each surface by hand and I am pretty sure I could apply makeup in her shower screen; because she cleans it then Windex’s it….

I, on the other hand am pretty sure I still own an iron – but when I last used it...Oh, I don’t know about 3 years ago. I don’t think I emptied the water out of it so it’s probably a big rusty mess.

I am currently interviewing cleaning products to get through the soap scum on my shower screen – I’m also interviewing maids/nannies so I can actually get a moment to clean said shower screen.

But you know what truly sets her apart from other housewives…..

She loves doing it!

I think I’m adopted because I can easily think of 15 things I would rather be doing than cleaning my shower or rearranging my pantry, linen cupboard, underneath my sink, my fridge and also my bake wear cupboard.

I can’t find ANYTHING!!!!

I knew I had to do something when Rusty walked into our kitchen to see Mum washing the floor for the third time that day on her hands and knees with a Chux because “a mop just doesn’t do the job right…..”

If I haven’t already filled you in, Rusty is a bit of a neat freak. Probably wouldn’t notice if there was a small alien colony in the sink but leave your book on the arm of the couch and you’ll hear him sigh a mile away.

He stopped and considered the situation for a moment, then turned and looked at me with that quizzical look guys get when they are confused about something…

It was a look that clearly said “If your mum is like this….what happened to you????”

You see, I believe mops do a fantastic job. Floors really only need to be mopped every couple of days unless there is a spill and yes, sometimes things go in the microwave uncovered.

I’m not perfect….there I said it!

So while I’m absolutely sooooooo thankful to Mum for coming to help out she went home just in the nick of time – I’m pretty sure I saw Rusty googling Good Housekeeping last night.

Some things just won’t do!

Thanks for stopping by!

Hugs

Dee xoxoxox